The Five Things that you should never say to a Pregnant Woman

Saturday, January 10, 2015

[Personal] I have been wanting to write this post like .. forever! Ever since people got to know the good news, I have been bombarded with many well-wishes (thank u!) ... and unsolicited advice. *Insert helpless face* While Im not the most fussy person (I really really dun mind people touching my belly! I dun see what the fuss of touching someone's belly is really about but then again some people just simply dun like strangers or friends touching them but that's another story all together.) Anyways I decided to put together a little post just for laughs but seriously it wasn't all that funny when it happened to me...

You cannot/shouldn't eat/drink that!
Suddenly the everyone around me was concerned about what I was putting in my mouth or me practicing yoga. Its like I was constantly being judged on and perhaps I should just quit eating, go live in the batu cave and only drink water (plain, boiled and at room temperature only please.) for the whole 10 months? Calm your horses people. A responsible OB (or google) would have gone through what a pregnant woman should or shouldn't eat/drink and obviously thats also what mothers/MILs are for, too? I had a whole list of forbidden food that I shouldn't touch with a 10 foot pole with so yes actually I have conscientiously made that decision to eat the very thing that you warned me (infront of a whole table of people, no less.) about. Well, er thanks for making me like Im the most irresponsible mummy-to-be for drinking coffee. Or going yoga.
I did this/that and you should too!
What worked for you might NOT work for someone else. Dun scare mummies-to-be with your silly birth horror stories or how you heard it from your auntie's first cousin colleague friend. Instilling fear into a new mummy for your own perverse satisfaction is not funny. I mean, now I can't simply freak out and choose to 'return' the baby, right? I will have to go through labor anyhows, thank you very much. And stop going on about how epidural will 'paralyze' me or how great you are for choosing to go 'all-natural' without epidural. Or that C-sect is the only way to keep my husband. (Yes, really Im sure.) Har nar, har nar. We dun live in the caveman ages anymore and as long as the baby comes out, seriously there is no right or wrong way, can. Still must come out right? 
You will be breastfeeding right?
Another #$%^ moment. Breastfeeding is something very natural, very gooooood.. in fact, the best *insert 182338 reasons* yesss I know - but do you also realize that its a very sensitive topic that should be solely reserved for the mother to make her own call? Im sure the Cult of Breastfeeding Mothers will sneer at me but if people want to formula-feed their baby then let them go ahead, la. Also never ask you pay for their milk powder what. 
Why you look so fat ah
Ok. This one I kena first hand. #Truestory. I had someone call me up suddenly to ask when is my baby's EDD (estimated due date) and why I look so fat for someone who is not due soon. *insert stabbing action* For the record, up to date I have put on around 12 kg at 32 weeks of pregnancy and although I feel like a whale.. YOU DUN NEED TO TELL ME THAT RIGHT??? You know Im carrying a baby in me so why the fuck you want to remind me that Im fat??? What do you expect me to do??? 
You all plan this SG50 baby for Jubilee present right?
Yes. *deep breath* I planned this SG50 baby so that I would get the 8 Jubilee items that I might have absolutely no fucking use for. But ya ~ thanks for reminding. U damn gian peng to think of that in the first place, lor.
Always remember the golden rule in life.. if you have nothing good to say, then dun! 
Hahahhaa! Or if you come across any preggy woman.. just say "Awwww u look sooo GOOD!" Or glowly/fabulous/pretty! God will forgive for telling this white lie one ok. Or just a plain Congrats! That'll do just fine you know! Tee heee.
Just for laughs, k! No offence to all the genuine well-meaning people who have dropped me notes or wished me well personally. I love you all! 
Back soon!
Have a great weekend, all! 
xoxoxoxo
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The author reserves the right to deny that its actually you who she is referring to in the above article. But hey, if the shoe fits. *insert big smile*

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5 comments

  1. Hahah I can totally identify with this! But it's only after my pregnancy that I knew how to be more tactful around mummies and mummies-to-be :) Don't worry la, sometimes it's just water retention. Keep calm and eat! lol

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  2. Nice post. Wait till the baby comes along.. There will be more. ;)

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  3. Cherie,
    Lolol i dun really have water retention yet! Guess its really all fats! Haha! But seriously i eat alot coz my appetite is sooo good! Even during my MS, i can eat - puke - eat again!!! Faint

    Lady in Waiting
    Haha i can imagineeeee 😖
    But then maybe i can collect all the "gems" for another post lor! Hehe!

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  4. Super funny lah u babe!! dun need to care, just remember...happy mummy.. happy baby!! *muacks*

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  5. Thank u my dear Evil-Lin!
    Hahhaah no la not angry hehe Im a HAPPY mummy (i hope!) Kekeke thanks for much for ur love! xo

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