Update .. and on my Helper-from-Hell

Friday, August 29, 2014

[Personal Post] Hellooooooooooooo! 
I think it has been AGESSSSS since I switched on my laptop...! 
As you know, I wasnt feeling too well after I got back from Malaysia and it was kinda hard trying to get my grove back. Admittedly I did alot of resting (and watching youtube, haa!) and was just trying to keep social media to a minimum. Blogging is something I really love but its not really everything (sorry, my darling pink blog) - I have been going out with friends and my family and even attending events with my dearest blogger friends but Im just not rushing to follow datelines or post schedules as often as I used to. (Sorry PR friends, I'll reply emails/msgs soon! xx) 
The other thing that really kept me busy was my previous HELPER FROM HELL (roll eyes) !!! If you have been following this space, I have been without help for a pretty long time (3 months and counting?) After my previous helper went back, we had to find another helper and it was unfortunate that her papers was delayed in Philippines so we were left without a helper for around 2 and a half months. Thats actually fine with me, I do housework (contrary to what my mother thinks lol) but it is physically tiring to do Housework/Blog/Facebook/Youtube/Look Pretty etc. So essentially... I was left looking like this (below, minus the cigarette) on most days. 

The story on my Helper-from-Hell (A condensed version)
Anyways... after waiting for my helper (Lets call her E) for around 2+ months, we finish all the paperwork needed for getting a helper in Singapore quickly and efficiently and it wasnt long before we were told by our agents that she has arrived in Singapore. The normal procedure was for her to get some basic training and a medical checkup before we get to bring her back home and its usually quite hassle-free for those who have done it all before.
Around a week later, we got a dreaded call from our agent saying that E did not pass her initial medical checkup as her blood pressure was above average. 158 to be precise? And thats already borderline high aka Grade 1 Hypertension (click here for more info) and E has to be on medication to bring her BP down. Our hearts sank slightly at this new information becoz this job is physically demanding so we're not very sure if the new helper could adjust to her new environment especially with her current BP condition. To cut the story short, our agent suggest giving E another chance as (I quote) "She really, really wants to work for you". The doctor prescribes medication and our helper goes for another medical checkup and her blood pressure is under control and she passes the second medical checkup. So okayyyy.. everything is set and we bring her home from the agent.
Abit of background story on my new helper, E. We chose her from our regular agent and she's 38, with 4 children and from a village in Philippines. Our previous helpers are also from the same country, but they were younger and with younger helpers, you get a different set of problems with them. Namely.. handphones! They are sooooo defensive over their handphones/off days and they seem to not bother about earning a living, but rather prefer to have a holiday in Singapore instead. I dun have any ill-feelings towards that (or them) but this time round, we just wanted to get someone more mature I guess. 
Day 1 Monday : We picked up our helper from our agent on Monday and as I live with my in-laws, my MIL (mother-in-law) is the one mainly in-charge of training new helpers. Im the calefare, the one that steps in to translate or explain in detail if in any case that my MIL can't manage or whenever she needs help. So on Day 1, after settling E down (house/her room etc tour) we quickly got down to business and taught her how to basically clean a room (sweeping/mopping) and washing a toilet. From the very first day .. E says she doesnt know how to use a toilet brush. 
In case got people also dunno what a toilet brush is. 
I mean... even my husband (who is like a dirty pig) KNOWS what to do with a toilet brush. If its not to wash a toilet bowl.. then? Brush teeth? Clean sink? 
My MIL decides to play it cool so she DEMONSTRATES it to E. The next thing we know, E says she doesnt know how to use newspaper to clean mirrors. She's walking on thin ice I tell u coz these are really quite basic stuff and its almost impossible to say that you have NEVER done all these before. My MIL decides to test her by saying that she'll call the agent to 'scold' them coz they 'very bad not to teach all this in training class' right? Righttttttt. Suddenly E's housework amnesia have miraculously recovered and she says training has taught them to do it actually! *insert clap* 
Day 2 Tuesday : The very next day, its my turn to supervise and guide my new helper on how to clean my room. Its not rocket science seriously.. Make a bed, sweep/mop the floor, wipe the tables and then wash the toilet. Something that E has done the day before. I told E to change bedsheets while I observe and guess how long she took to change my King's size bed with 4 pillows and one blanket. GUESS......
She took ONE HOUR AND 40 MINUTES (WITH MY HELP) 
Im not kidding u......... Im not the most patient person I admit but this really took the cake. Almost 2 whole hours on one freaking bed where it usually takes the same amount of time to do the WHOLE room, including washing of toilet. Yes.. I understand that E is new. But you know why she took so long? BECOZ SHE WAS TRYING TO BRAINWASH ME TO GIVE HER MONEY.
I might look nice.. I might look young.. I might look stupid.. but hey I can smell a rat when someone tries to pull a fast one on me. Barely here for 2 days and asking me to give her money on her upcoming off day so that she can give offering to church???? WHICH CHURCH CALL U GIVE THEM MONEY BEFORE YOU EVEN EARN MONEYYYYY????? *insert church name ____ here* 
I kept my composure (although I feel like screaming "Just fxxx-ing do the bed la!") and said to her calmly and as nonchalantly as possible, I told her to start working properly, get her pay after repaying her agent's loan then think about giving offering to church. 
Btw, my one room + toilet took nearly 5 hours (with lunch inbetween) to finish that day. *facepalm* 
Day 3 Wednesday : I wake up around 8ish-9am each day but the rest of family wakes up earlier (work etc) I usually finish my cup of coffee or a piece of bread by 10am latest and into the sink it goes. Im not the cleanest, or the most OCD person around but I took this picture (below) at 2.38pm and NONE OF THE CUPS & DISHES FROM BREAKFAST HAS BEEN WASHED.
Given that my in-laws have coffee at 8am.. and mine at 9-ish. These have been lying in the sink for 5 FREAKING HOURS??????? 3 cups??? 2 plates???? Like, seriously E????? U chose to ignore these for so long even though I saw u drinking/eating before I went out for lunch??????
Purposely one right.
Day 4 Thursday : Its a nice Thursday morning and as much I want to get on with my wonderful life .. I wake up only to hear my MIL in the living room sighing in exasperation. Soooo today, my wonderful and lovely helper decides that she doesnt remember how to wash toilets. AGAIN. New day.. new pattern I guess. E wants me to WRITE ALL THE TOILET WASHING INSTRUCTIONS down on paper for her so that she 'remember'. Off we troop to the toilet and start right from the beginning. I said it once and Im saying it again.. I might look stupid but dun ever treat me like an idiot. WHY SHOULD I WRITE INSTRUCTIONS FOR U? Later u say u dun understand what I write how. So why dun YOU wash the toilet and YOU write at the same time. Im a nice person, I volunteer to hold your notebook & pen for u. Practical and theory. Thats how we rocked in school didnt we? 2 lines later, my helper decides she can remember everything. 
Day 5 Friday : Great. Its Clean-My-Room day again and Im definitely not looking forward to it. Im tired, totally not feeling well and all I wanted to do is to do away with all the drama, just get my room cleaned and lemme take a nap after lunch. But no... my amazing helper decides to go SLOW-MO on me and insists on taking a shower first even though I told her that she needs to wash my room's toilet today. (Like, dun you shower AFTER washing toilets?) But ok. Im part of a democratic society and based on justice and equality.. You wan go shower, you go shower. Shower did she........ for 45 minutes. 
It was almost 2pm and I was feeling extremely sick that day so I didnt want to scold anyone. I just wanted E to do her job and clean my room so that I could get some rest. After afew days of housework I would think that my helper could work independently right? I mean, how difficult is sweeping the floor? Yes. I was WRONG. A big fat WRONG. Despite feeling unwell, I had to supervise the whole sweep/mop/make bed procedure again and once again my room alone took a good 3-4 hours to be done. We ended at around 6pm. My dream of napping went up in a smoke. By the way, I think some people can clean their WHOLE house in that time. 
Day 6 Saturday : Saturday went past quite uneventfully coz we dun do alot of housework on weekends (no washing of toilets, Thank God!) - mostly ironing and some general housekeeping. Oh and talking about ironing ... Did I mention that earlier in the week when my MIL told E to improve on her ironing (too many creases and extremely slow) she actually had the cheek to say that she will iron better if she gets to iron clothes everyday at 2pm sharp after lunch ......... *insert crow fly past*
The night ended on a "great" note when I told E to have a good sleep becoz its her off day on Sunday and I reminded her not to do anything but to rest well. 
"Off day also no use. Got no money." came the swift reply. 
Day 7 Sunday : Ahhhh... Sunday. The day that I have been looking forward to coz its E's off day and she doesnt need to do housework = no problem. Rightttt..? Once again. I WAS WRONG! We have church on Sundays as hubby & I prepare to head off to church like any other day.. I walk into the living room with my in-laws shaking their head. 
My most marvelous helper E decided to wake up early first thing in the morning and ask my MIL for MONEY. AGAIN. 
Thats not all, arh.
After my MIL refused, E proceeded to put a sarong/cloth on the floor in front of her personal toilet and LIE DOWN ON THE FLOOR without washing up or brushing teeth. 
Got so er xin people anot.......???????????????
We packed her off to our wonderful agent ASAP.
So yeah. 
#StoryOfMyLife.
*Disclaimer : Everything I wrote here really happened. Actually I skipped so many parts coz I really didnt want to end up with high blood pressure myself. 
******
Writing all these out really made me feel BETTER! Hahaha! Yeah I was pretty frustrated in the beginning but I guess I've learnt to accept that shit happens. In fact Im thankful that it wasnt worse, so now when I look back at all the incidents, I can actually laugh it off with my hubby. Although I still roll my eyes at the lying infront of the toilet part. #TotallyWin.
Hope u have a great weekend, guys! 
Off to catch up on my other upcoming posts. :)
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7 comments

  1. Oh my gosh..... that's worst than having a helper!!!!! So bad!! Hope you find a good one soon!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Get an Indonesian one. I have changed at least 5 pinoys away in a span of 2 years before I decided that maybe Indonesians will be better and yes I was so right. My pinoy helpers old or young all had the same hp and bf and Sundays problem. My current Indonesian helper is god sent. Clean, tidy, neat, nice and steady. I say I like to eat indo food she quickly rack her brains to whip up nice dishes for me.

    I hope you find the right one soon! Hehe

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hey dear I understand how you feel omg my helper (from Myanmar) also equally as horrible as yours. Been here for about a month now and she broke so many things without even apologizing or notifying us (play dumb and think we don't know). Worst of all, 1st week teach her all the basic chores already she still come act dumb and say she don't know how to do wtf. I think I do more chores than her lol. Maid these days, gosh. Don't know is come here to work or to purposely anger us Singaporeans.

    ReplyDelete
  4. OMG! I know how you feel!
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    Will follow you back! :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. OMG. Yeah, I totally feel you man even though I didn't train nor hire maid myself. My boyfriend's family did and we have gone through SO MANY within a short period of time as well. Now, we all just give up and decided not to hire any more helpers but do ourselves instead. :/ Tough man! Hopefully, you'll find one soon that actually is of much help! :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. OMG... that was really bad. But I enjoy reading becos' you write so well...lol...!!
    Hope you get an angel next, fingers crossed !!!

    ReplyDelete
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